At the Heart of Thornhaven Farm (written Holy Saturday 2016)

            On this Holy Saturday morning, when our dear Lord keeps the Sabbath in the tomb, one cannot help but see this whole world as passing away.  In the light of these high holy days which re-present the mysteries of our Faith in time, in which we see the terrible reality of the cost of our sins and the unfathomable depths of Divine Love, one cannot help but feel that nothing else really matters.  We have seen Divine Love stretched out on the Wood of the Cross and shed every drop of His Precious Blood for love of us, to save us.  We have seen Him laid in the tomb, where He now takes His rest in death.  We eagerly await His rising at the Vigil this evening when death will finally be trampled under His holy feet and hope will spring forth like the seedlings in spring.

            All this makes me look at our farm in a different light and ask the question, “Why are we doing all this?”  In the light of the events of the Triduum, I must confess that part of me asks whether or not we ought to forget about the farm and fill the street corners with our preaching of the Divine Love of Jesus.  The Triduum makes the farm seem like such an inconsequential thing. 

            And frankly, it can be, if it is done out of the wrong motive.  I am reminded again of what Fr. McNabb wrote, “Leave the garden cities and the fleshpots, not in order to scorn suburbia or to lead a simple life, but to worship God.”   The right worship of God is the only reason to head to the land.

            If we are doing this simply out of a desire for peace and quiet, it’s worthless.  Don’t get me wrong, peace and quiet are nice, but they cannot be the end of this venture.  If we are doing this simply out of a desire for stability, it’s worthless.  Again, I am a huge proponent of the stability the agrarian life offers a society as opposed to the fickleness of the market economy, but that stability cannot be the end.  If we are doing this simply as a way of being “set up” for the fallout when our society collapses, it’s worthless.  Again, I think a sustainable farm would be much better able to weather such a collapse, but this cannot, it must not be the end.  The only real preparation for a societal collapse or apocalypse is holiness.  Our preparation does not consist in filling bunkers with food.  It consists in Holy Communion and Holy Confession as often as possible – it is preparation for martyrdom primarily, and we prepare for martyrdom by entering the cleansing waters of the Confessional, receiving the Strength of Martyrs Himself in Holy Communion, and learning to abandon ourselves entirely to His will.  All the temporal preparation is worthless if our souls are not prepared to meet the God Who made them.

            Why, then, are we doing all this?  Love.  Divine Charity can be the only motive.  That is why our farm got the name “Thornhaven” so long ago.  It is because our security, our joy, our peace, our happiness, our lives do not depend on the farm, they depend on the thornhaven of the Sacred, Burning Heart of Jesus.  It is for love of Him that we do what we do.  This is the only motive that will sustain us, for it is He alone who sustains us by His love.  It must be for love of Jesus that I get up in the morning long before dawn to begin my day.  It must be for love of Jesus that I milk the goats.  It must be for love of Jesus that I slop the pigs.  It must be for love of Jesus that I clean the chicken coop.  It must be for love of Jesus that I cut the hay.  Without this as the motive of all that I do, nothing I do will have any value… it will all be worthless. 

            If it is not a return for the Love He has shown me at the Last Supper, on the Cross, in the Tomb, or in His Rising, then it is completely meaningless, and it would be better for me to give it all up. 

            If it is not because of the freedom it allows me to make my life a life of prayer and to center the life of my family on the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, where we stand at the foot of Calvary every single day and receive the Fruit of that Tree of Life so that we might have the strength we need to love Him in return for His love for us, then there is no reason for us to be here.  Without love, a man’s life is but dust.  Without Divine Love, he has nothing to offer anyone, even those he loves the most.

            If our hope is not in Him, if our lives are not anchored in that Thornhaven, then they will be a frenetic mess.  They will be void of all peace, order, joy, and love.  If our pride and vanity make us swell up too much to fit through that Narrow Gate of a lance wound to enter the New Garden of His Heart, then we will have failed miserably.

            All our work must be done from within that Heart.  It is, after all, a Human Heart, drawn from the dust of the earth like all the rest of humanity, and yet it can contain all the dust of the earth within it, for it is also the Heart of God.  We must cast all that we love and all that we are into that Furnace of Charity, that all may be transformed and renewed by His Burning Love.  It is not until we have cast our farm into this Heart that we can know how to see it properly, to work it properly, to love it properly, as He loves it.  And He does love this farm, because everything that He made by His love is also sustained by His love.

            O my Jesus, deliver us from the folly of farming for any other reason than that of loving You and spreading love for You to every soul we meet.  Deliver us from loving the earth with any other love than Your love for the earth.  Let us never forget that we are here, on the land, to worship You, not to worship the earth or ourselves.  Everything we do here must be done for love of You.  Everything must be done from within Your Sacred, Burning Heart.  We humbly ask that you take us and hide us in the Thornhaven of Your Heart, where we can love and be loved, where we can see rightly, where we can find the Source of our strength, where we can be safe from the enemy and sin which long to corrupt us and draw us out of the Garden as our first parents were drawn.  Teach us to gather in the praises of all Your creatures here on this farm and bring them to the foot of the Cross that their praises and our constant chorus of love might drown out the blasphemies, mockeries, and putrid hate that fill Your ears in Your great act of Love. 

            O Mary, let our song and the song of all creation pass through your Immaculate Heart, that all dissonance may be turned into beautiful harmony for your Son Who has so loved the world and has been so little loved in return.  Remind us with every glance to the blue sky over our heads, that to be under your mantle is to be in His Heart.  Keep us always under your mantle and direct us always with your motherly hands to do all for love of Him.  Help us, by our little way of love, to build up a society where He is better known and loved, where His Love may flourish in every heart and spill over to the earth who is groaning, eagerly awaiting the unveiling of the sons of God, that all creation’s praise might rise more beautifully to His ears.

            Jesus, Mary, I love you, save souls.